Whoops, already skipped a day

I'm so bummed that I didn't get to record my day yesterday so I'll give a rundown (if I can remember).  Hmm.. well, I've been quite depressed because of the illness taking over everything!  I didn't get anything done yesterday or today.  I've had horrible pain and sheer exhaustion both days.  I took Colostrum both days, but no vitamins.  Woke up today in tons of pain with crazy dizziness, vertigo, blurred vision and started getting a headache a bit later on.  No idea where any of this came from.  Just sort of started when I woke up at 11 AM and really didn't go away for most of the day.  Having different pain today.  My shoulder pain was so intense and shooting up my arm, that I thought I might be having a heart attack.  Ugh.

Food consumed yesterday (or at least what I can recall):
Coffee w/Rice Milk, Water, Pudding, Fruit Snacks, Mini Snickers Bar, Chocolate Cookies with Cream, Pizza Slice from Pulcinella (best pizza in Fort Collins!), Chinese (Asian Grill Express - No MSG!) Food for dinner - Lo Mein, Sesame Chicken, Chicken w/Vegetables.  Other snacks - Doritos,  Sierra Mist, Homemade Brownies, 1 two bite cupcake from www.buttercreamcupcakery.com., Pluot (Organically grown and locally farmed - Door to Door Organics where we get most of our fruits and vegetables.  The prices are fantastic and they deliver, which is perfect for my fibromyalgia.  Greatest service ever and the veggies are amazing!  If you live in the area, check them out!!!

Food today:
Fruit Snacks, Coffee w/Rice Milk, Pudding x 2 (one w/Colostrum), Chinese for lunch and dinner - including Garlic Shrimp, Sesame Chicken, Chicken w/Vegetables, Lo Mein, 2 Fortune Cookies.  Other snacks - Chocolate Cookies, Nacho Cheese Doritos, 4 Mini Candy Bars, Rice Dream Ice Cream - Jeez, I hope that's it.  Seems like I'm eating enough for 10!  Aaaaaaah!  No wonder I feel so crappy.  It's 12:14 and I'm still hungry. :(

Mood:
Horrible.  Depressed, disappointed, confused, misguided, lost and feel like I need some serious therapy ASAP!!!  Will look into that tomorrow.  Not to mention, must go back to Physical Therapy (PT).  It used to help a lot so will have someone start taking me again.  Back to mood.  Stressed about trip, money, life, marriage, health, friends, basically everything you can be stressed about.  Did I mention... major stress about not being able to keep up with commitments that I have made that I actually do want to keep!  I'm not crafting; therefore, I'm not me and if I'm not me, who am I?  I have no idea, but the person that is replacing the former me is not a happy person.  So I need some help getting back to me.  Any thoughts?  Any input?  I would love some advice here on how to cope with everything and how to try to live a quasi-normal life with this debilitating "syndrome" that is quickly becoming my nemesis!  Aaaah!  I am panicking lately about everything.  I have a snowball effect going on with work piling up and money dwindling down and just everything that can go wrong, lately, has been going wrong.  I just need some clarity.  My head is fogged and I need to clear it.  It will get better.  This is just a rough time.

Pain Levels/Concerns
Today most of my pain is in both shoulders, left arm, fingers, and especially the knees.  My neck and back are very sore too and I have an on and off headache.  My fourth toe, that I broke a couple of months ago is still throbbing daily.  I was short of breath today, got super hot and super dizzy and started getting tunnel vision.

Medicines today
I took Opana, Opana ER, and a Citalopram, then went back to sleep til 11 AM.  At 11, woke up with extreme vertigo, could't see straight, felt sick to my stomach and had tons of pain.  Wasn't sure what to do,so did nothing for quite a while.  Later I took a total of 3 Oxys and 1 Phenergyn, then I added a Meclizine for the Vertigo and 2 Loraz to calm me down.  At bedtime I took an Opana ER and an Opana.  I'm itchy again, so going to try the Benadryl.  Hopefully it will help me sleep too.

Yesterday I believe I took
Opana, Opana ER, Citalopram, Lorazepam - I got super itchy so took 2 Benadryl, 1 Phenergyn, Opana again and Opana ER again.  I cannot recall if I took any Oxy.  If I did, it would have been 2.  Tomorrow I will try to do without.  It only takes 7 straight days to make a pill a habit and I don't want that!

Weather
Sunny and hot with no real clouds today.  I think it was in the high 80s or 90s

Symptoms
Knees hurt so bad, I had a very difficult time getting downstairs and back up today.  Normally make lots of trips up and down.  Today maybe only 10 trips.  My knees are still hurting in bed and today, my left knee is hurting as bad as the right.  Would almost like to get them x-rayed to see if I messed something up when I fell because the pain is just horrible.  I needed assistance getting in and out of the bathtub tonight b/c of knee pain.  It was nice to relax when I was finally able to get in and lie down.  Also having FI problems too.  Not sure what the cause of that is, but it's becoming bothersome.

Outlook
DT challenge projects done and posted, albeit late.  I have some remodeling ideas I need to write down on paper as well and start looking into our options for flooring.  I will also try to get an appt. with a counselor and PT.

Goodnite World!  Sweet Dreams!
AJ